That Hobbit Lady

I’ve just been looking at some of the poems that I wrote a long, long time ago, way back when I was in high school. I just felt like sharing some of these. Most of these were written 1974-1975 so I guess I was maybe a senior in high school? I apologize upfront if these poems might be a bit sappy, but I think you at least have to admire the optomist I was.

YOU IN THE MORNING

If you hate to get up in the morning
dreading to meet a flower or face
then the days…go..slow…
but the years passfast
Sorrowful and Empty.

But if you greet the morning
as your oldest and truest friend
(which the morning is)
they you are ALIVE
and Happiness overflows your cup of Time.

CLOUDS

If there were no clouds,
could we love the sky for being blue?
If there were no lies
could we love the Truth for being true?

PLACES AND FACES

Places
and faces and
traces of times I know
become what I am and live as
I grow

LOVE

Love isn’t love
unless you make it show.
Love doesn’t say
“You come to me.”
Love goes.

FLEETING FEELINGS

All my earthly joys
are very worthless joys
if I don’t believe that God
will take me when I die.

Happiness will pass
Only Memories last
How glad I’ll be to take them
to the Spirit in the sky.

There is no happiness small
unless there is happiness all
and good feelings about Forever
can quiet the moment’s sigh.

Well, this might be somewhat of a personal subject, but I feel compelled to say something about it, because it’s got me so freakin’ annoyed! Bra shopping. What a pain! Here’s my issue: as anyone who knows me can testify, I need more than a little support up there. So when I see the words “Full Figure” in the newspaper ads, or on the rack, that is where I gravitate. But when I get there, what do I find? The “Full Figure” support is only available…if you don’t *actually* have a full figure! Normally, bra sizes go up to about 42D. Well, I need something a bit “fuller” than that. But on the “Full Figure” rack at the local Penney’s, that’s as high as it goes! If you need 44 or 46, you are just plum out of luck searching through the “Full Figure” racks at Penneys.

I’m only talking about Penney’s right now. Maybe tomorrow I’ll try Sears and see if I have any more luck. Wal Mart? Fuggedaboutit!

There are Big and Tall Men’s clothing shops. I guess I’ve got to find a “Full Figured” women’s clothing shop and hope I can find something there. Or, I could lose a little weight, thus becoming less full figured, since as I recall when I was 20 pounds lighter back in 2005-2006, I was back in “normal” sized clothes.

Yeah, I think that’s what I’d most like to do. But in the meantime (as losing weight does tend to take time, does it not?) where exactly am I supposed to shop for new bras?

Every now and then I visit Target during my lunchbreak for a cheap hot dog and soda lunch. (I love hot dogs, but because they’re not really good for you, I don’t like buy whole packages to eat at home, so the occasional snack bar hot dog is a real treat.)

When I visit Target, there is very often a particular guy behind the snack bar counter who rings up my meal. He has a long, long dark ponytail. I mean long, long, practically down to his waist.

Have I ever mentioned that I really dig it when a guy has a ponytail?

Today, I went into Target, and there was a young man behind the counter….with very, very short dark hair. Military short. I looked at him and couldn’t figure out if ponytail guy had gotten sick of all the knots and trouble and decided to cut it all off. All that hair was such a part of his appearance that I honestly could not tell if this was him or not.

But if it was him, I was prepared to mourn. There was just something so cool about that ponytail.

Happily, as I passed by the snack bar on my way out a few minutes later (after buying cat food and yogurt), I saw ponytail guy! He was back behind the counter, ponytail still firmly in place. The other guy with the short hair I had seen was someone else, not him!

Now why do I mention all this? Only to say, I really dig it when a guy has a ponytail. Except for height, I think hair is probably the number one feature of a guy’s appearance that I will notice and decide whether or not I think he’s attractive.

And all this comes on the heels of another recent observation:

Last year Alabama did really, really well in football. But our quarterback, John Parker Wilson, (who was not a *great* quarterback, but he improved with time, and he was definitely adequate) has graduated, and now we are ready to break in a new starting quarterback, somebody-McElroy.

I can’t remember McElroy’s first name. And I can’t remember the way he looks either. I know I’ve seen pictures of him once or twice, but if I had to pick him out of a line-up, I just couldn’t do it. Why? Because he has short hair! And an unremarkable face. (My apologies to his girlfriend and his mother! I’m just telling you how I see it.)

But JP Wilson…well, anybody could have picked him out of a lineup. He had the HAIR. He has this sort of blondish hair that…well, never mind. Here are some pics:

And he has lips too, you’ll notice. The hair! The lips! Not that any of that has anything to do with how far or how accurately a guy can throw a football, but I’m just saying, there was no mistaking JP.

Okay, I think I’ve gone on long enough. The moral of this story is: Guys! Celebrate your hair!

A sad day. My mom called this morning to tell me that my Aunt Jeanette died. She was 89, and apparently she died in her sleep, after not feeling well for several weeks. She was still living at home, with her daughter and grandson, and to the best of my knowledge she was not incapacitated in any way. When it’s my time to go, I would like something similar.

Aunt Jeannette is the first of my aunts to die. I have five biological aunts on my mom’s side, all between 70 and 90. We have long life in my family. And, I also hope, good life.

When I remember my Aunt Jeanette, the first thing I think of is her laugh. One of the main *sounds* I remember from my childhood, back in the day when I was a child running around with all my cousins, was Aunt Jeanette’s long, loud laugh, whenever we had a family get-together. Her laugh was unmistakable, and could be heard from clear around the other side of the block. (The other sound I remember, of course, was the traditional singing of “Sto-Lot” at every birthday, the Polish version of “For he’s a jolly good fellow,” or “How old are you now?” that was always sung after “Happy Birthday.”)

I also remember that Aunt Jeanette had a keen interest in the supernatural. I think she was the one that noted that if the pictures on your wall were crooked, it was a sign that “the spirits are telling you to leave the house.” I also remember her once saying that she saw Jesus (I believe she saw Him outside, leaning against a car), and “He was SO TALL!!”

Uncle Eddie has been gone several years now. I hope that he and Aunt Jeanette are now together again in Heaven, along with Babcie and Dzydzyie. My world just got a little smaller, and another piece of my childhood has slipped away. But not really, because there are always the memories.

“Sto-Lot,” that Polish birthday song, translates out to “A hundred years, a hundred years, may you live a hundred years!” Aunt Jeanette didn’t quite make a hundred, but it seems to me she had a pretty good run. I hope she’s seeing Jesus now, and I hope He’s even taller than she remembers.

Has anyone seen the commerial from the US Post Office about their new flat box shipping rate (or some such thing.) The slogan is:

If it fits, it ships.

ahem…

Say that again? Ten times fast? I dare ya.

Have you been in McDonald’s lately? Have you seen the cute little pictures on the bags? I went in for breakfast recently, and as I was eating my sausage burrito, I stopped to look at this bag, and at first I thought, “OH! How cute! Look at the cute little piggy bank. I guess they’re saying how you can have breakfast at McDonald’s with only the spare change from your piggy bank.”

But then I took a closer look. I couldn’t figure out for the life of me what those square things at the bottom were (Russ later told me he thought they must be slices of cheese…what do you think?) but there is definitely no doubt that that is a GRATER standing up next to the piggy. And when I realized that, the whole thing took on a completely new meaning. And it was not very pleasant.

So, McDonald’s…you show me this cute little piggy…then you show me a GRATER…all while I’m eating a SAUSAGE burrito. Ugh. Suddenly I was losing my appetite.

Did McDonald’s know what they were doing when they put together these images? And if they did know…then why did they do it? It just doesn’t seem to make any sense. I, for one, was kind of turned off sausage burritos after seeing this.

Which is probably just as well, cos I’m sure they’re not very good for you, anyway. And *definitely* not good for cute little piggies like this one.

Well, I don’t usually watch American Idol. I did way back in the day, the whole first season, with Justin and Kelly, and then the second season with Reuben and Clay, but after that I kind of lost interest. (I also lost my cable TV at the time, which may have had something to do with it.) But this year I have TV, and for some reason, a couple of weeks ago, I decided to tune in and see what’s going on.

Oh! I remember what it was that got me interested again. It was Susan Boyle. Who hasn’t seen and heard Susan Boyle? Fantastic! What a story! And what do you think, should she have a makeover or not? Well, she’s had sort of a mini-makeover, last I heard, but that’s as far as she should go, I think.

But I digress. What happened was, I was reading something about Susan Boyle, and Britain’s Got Talent, and they were comparing it to American Idol, and saying how AI has lost it’s spark, so I guess that was what made me want to tune in and see what was happening over on this side of the pond.

Well, I beg to differ. No spark lost here. By the time I tuned in, they were down to four very accomplished performers. I got to see the red-headed girl be voted off, which was really sad, because I liked her, she was quite different than your usual run-of-the-mill Idol hopeful, and I thought she did a great job singing with Adam.

But now there’s three. Three really cute guys, who can all sing like mad. Except now there’s only two, because last night, Danny Gokey got voted off.

And once again, I’m sad. Because I really liked Danny. I thought he was definitely the cutest of the bunch (love the glasses! And the smile…), and his voice has the most personality. But the American Public (or some boardroom full of Idol executives posing as the American Public, I’m still not completely sure the show isn’t rigged) said “No. Goodbye, Gokey.”

And he’s gone.

Only he’s not. Is he? Because I fully suspect he’ll have a singing career. In fact, I would be very surprised if all four of the young singers I have seen this year don’t end up having some kind of singing career. I think they’re all good, and marketable.

But here’s the strange thought I had today.

So last night, Danny was voted off. And next week it will be either Kris or Adam who DOESN’T get to be the American Idol. But you know what…

So what?

Is it really that great to be the American Idol? As I mentioned, I was watching during season two, when Rueben Studdard “won” over Clay Aiken. But today, who’s got the more successful career? And it may have happened before, during some of the other seasons when I wasn’t watching (I’m not really sure, but I wouldn’t be surprised).

Here’s the thing: when you win as the American Idol, your career is immediately placed in the hands of…who? Some record executives that YOU DIDN’T CHOOSE. They’re going to mold you and fashion you and your career into some vision that THEY have, and it may not be what you would choose for yourself.

But the “losers” in second and third place, they may have different record companies come courting THEM. And they may get to pick and choose to a greater degree than the Idol “winner” gets to do. They may get to call at least SOME of the shots.

So when Danny got “voted off” maybe he wasn’t saying “Oh, crap, I didn’t get it!” Maybe he was saying “Whew! That was close. I almost got locked in.” Maybe he’s relieved that he will now have the opportunity to have a greater degree of control over how his career will proceed.

Or….maybe not. Maybe I have no idea what I’m talking about. Maybe I need to stop worrying about American Idol and get a life. 😉 But I do hope that in that life, at some point in the future, I’ll be able to buy a Danny Gokey CD.

I’m sure everyone has their own “pet peeves” and I’m no exception. I have many, but here’s one that recently occurred to me, and I just want to gripe about it.

Anyone who knows me knows that I have a long history of couponing. So sometimes, when I go on-line, I visit a restaurant’s website, and join their “Club,” in hopes that they will email me some good coupons. Now, some of them do! Arby’s….Wendy’s….TGIF’s….I’ve gotten good coupons from all of them.

But what’s the deal with Panera? And Moe’s Southwest Grill? Yes, I know your restaurant exists, I know you have good food, you don’t need to send me an ADVERTISEMENT to tell me about it all over again. If I’m going to take the time to open your email, I expect there to be something worthwhile inside! Opening your email only to find an advertisement that does not contain any kind of coupon or special offer is akin to opening a very prettily wrapped present only to find the box completely empty! Don’t get my hopes up, and don’t waste my time! If you’re going to send me something, then send me something of VALUE!

Pet Peeve expressed.

My sister has issued a challenge. She reminded me that Ernest Hemmingway has such a way with words (while some others of us, on the other hand…with…way…words…not…have…) that he could write a novel in only six words. In case you haven’t heard Hemminghway’s six-word novel, it reads thusly:

FOR SALE. BABY SHOES. NEVER WORN.

Yes, that brings us some ideas, some emotions, does it not? So Terry has challenged me to write a novel in six words. At first it seemed a daunting task, one to which I certainly had to give a good deal of thought, but after that good deal of thought I have indeed come up with several very short “Novels.”

First, I want to tell you Russ’ six-word novel:

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR.

And, of course the sequel:

‘COS YOU JUST…MIGHT…GET IT.

Now, here is mine:

THINK IT’S OVER, SWEETHEART? THINK AGAIN.

And here’s another one:

HE WAS BETTER THAN THE BEST.

See, the first one’s probably a story of crime and revenge, and I’ll be the second one is a love story.

But this is too easy! Six is too many words! How about five?

THAT SUMMER WAS PURE DELIGHT.

Another love story? But not my four-word novel:

THE DECEPTION IS COMPLETE.

Actually, that’s not original. I’m reading the Bloody Jack series, and that’s a line that seems to keep coming up. But it’s so jam-packed with emotion and intrigue, I couldn’t help using it.

Now, how about three words?

SINGS. DANCES. DIES.

Hmm…wonder what that’s all about?

Two words?

NEVER AGAIN.

And now the ultimate challenge, the one word novel. Here it is:

HELP!

Okay, I’m done.

How about you? Anyone willing to take up the challenge? I’d love to read some more six-word novels!

I don’t know if anyone else has been keeping up with this Miss California thing that happened a few days ago, but Russ and I watch Nancy Grace every night to find out what’s happening with Tot Mom, and then this entertainment show comes on, so I’ve heard more about the Miss California fiasco than I would have ever cared to know. And frankly, I’m flabbergasted.

Basically, at the pageant, one of the judges (I guess he was a judge) asked Miss California what she thought about gay marriage. That was the question, “What do you think?” And she answered and told him what she thought. I guess I should mention that the judge was obviously gay, and Miss America said that she thinks it’s wonderful that we live in a country where people can make choices, but she personally believes that marriage should only be between a man and a woman.

Well!

The judge did not like her answer, not one bit, to say the least. And if I’m understanding this correctly, he later went on his video-blog and called her the “B” word. He accused her of not being politically correct, and even went so far as to suggest that if she didn’t support gay marriage, then what she SHOULD have said was “Blah blah blah, mumbo jumbo I’m totally avoiding giving a real answer to this question.” He would have been happier hearing THAT than hearing her flat out say “I believe marriage should only be between a man and a woman.”

Hello!!!! Did you not ASK her what she thought? And then when she TOLD you what she thought, you blast her and call her a bit-ka? This judge did not really want to hear what she thought, what she believes, unless she happened to believe exactly what he believes! How hypocritical can you get?

When this guy asked this question, he absolutely knew that he was putting the beauty contestant in a big-time lose-lose situation. No matter WHAT she said, someone somewhere was going to be offended. The thinking now is that perhaps Miss California missed getting the crown because of the answer she gave to the gay marriage question. I contend that the moment that loaded question was put to her, there was no way she could win. (If, in fact, contestants’ answers to loaded questions are capable of keeping them from winning.) (Oh. And she was runner-up, I think, so not too bad after all, I would say.)

But anyway! That’s not what I’m flabbergasted about. And I’m also not flabbergasted about her answer, about whether or not she supports or doesn’t support gay marriage. That’s not even the issue, at this point, at least as far as I’m concerned. For me, the issue is this: I’m appalled by the judge! I’m offended by someone who is OFFENDED by an honest answer.

I’m also offended by someone who asks a loaded question, then resorts to the playground tactic of name-calling when things don’t go as he planned. (Miss California’s answer was followed by a generous mixture of both “boo’s” and applause. I don’t think the judge expected or appreciated the applause. I think he was peeved that basically the whole thing blew up in his face.)

Hey! You know what they say: if you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. If you don’t want to hear that there are people who don’t support gay marriage, then DON’T ASK! (To paraphrase a popular saying…Don’t want someone to tell? Then don’t ask!)

As for Miss California, I applaud her. I think she handled the situation with as much poise and charm as she possibly could under the circumstances. She did not “mumbo jumbo” up her answer in hopes of staying in the race for the crown. She did not back down, she firmly stated her own beliefs. And I personally think she did so in the most gracious manner possible, all things considered.

The funny thing about all this, I think, is that the gay judge accused Miss California of being insensitive and politically incorrect, but HIS reaction is the most insensitive and politically incorrect aspect of the whole fiasco.

I could go on. But enough said.