192
Yes, that’s bad. Somehow, I got out of the habit of coming here to post my weight, and also somehow I got out of the habit of paying attention to what I was eating. My mind just went elsewhere, and I really don’t know what to say about that. Sure, I’ve started writing my NaNo, so that’s been a bit of a distraction, but not enough to send me so offtrack in my weight loss efforts. Yes, we’ve been busy at work…but so what? I really can’t explain why I just stopped paying attention.
But that time is over, and it’s time to begin again. I think if I can just get started, I’ll be fine. It’s the getting started, getting over that first day or two that’s tough. Getting the sugar out of the system. Re-developing the old habits.
This is all really not much more than a matter of HABITS, but of course the great mystery of life: why is it so easy to develop bad habits and abandon good habits, while it is so difficult to develop good habits and abandon bad habits? The playing field is NOT level, when it comes to habits.
Anyway, I’m thinking one or two days of drinking a lot of water, and once I get over my period, I should be back in the ballpark of where I was before I stopped paying attention (around 187). Quickly on, quickly off. I hope.
I have a little time this morning, so I’ll just address one more issue. To me, food is celebration. I know this about myself, and I know I need to readjust myself psychologically, but that, my friend, is most difficult. Food is social, so when I want to be social, I eat. Every night Russ and I are sitting down and having nice big dinners together. It’s a fun, social time, but it’s wreaking havoc on the scale, and on my body. Where is it written that I have to eat the SAME food he is eating? Yeah, it might be a little more difficult in the kitchen, but there’s no reason why I have to eat the same foods. Just the act of eating together should be enough of a celebration.
Today I’m going to make a list of the foods that are good for me to eat. I can start right now, I know what they are: the fruits, the vegetables, rice, salmon, oatmeal, yoguart, and of course water, water, water. I know also the things to avoid: processed foods, canned foods, deep fried, diet sodas (pure poison), and mashed potatoes loaded with salt and butter. See? I know these things. I know them, and yet I do not do them. Where is the logic in that?
Wow, I’m on a roll, I could go on and on with this topic, but alas, the clock says I have two minutes until I have to start getting ready for work. Sometimes I think the problem might be nothing more than feeling RUSHED, simply not having the time to take the time to do what should be done, rather than doing the easy thing. Why is life so busy all the time? Well, now I have my NaNo, but even before that…so many things to do! Why is nothing simple?
I’ll ponder this some more later.
